Precious Moments with Dad

I posted this story on Hummingbird's "Sharing" Pod on grief, but I also wanted to share this with anyone who has lost  someone dear to them.

Growing up the oldest of five and Daddy's little girl, I spent much of my young life trying to please him and make him proud of me. It's not that he thought I was a failure but he pushed me to succeed in everything I attempted.. He was a perfectionist in the true sense. If I would have a bad grade, which I often did, he would tell me he knew I could do better!.
I never quiet made the grade, but I kept trying anyway.

When I reached the age when it was time to go out on my own, my Dad took it hard. He would often say to me, "If it doesn't work out , you can come home"... He would often stop by to ask if I needed help, even when I did, I wouldn't let him know.

My mom and dad divorced after 25 years of marriage and then my dad remarried a very young woman. When she died a few years later, I went to care for him until he got back on his feet. Dad remarried another young woman a few years later. She was a blessing for him. He became ill and deteriorated very fast. She took care of his every need with love and compassion, while protecting his dignity.

She called me one evening in October of 2005 and said " Your Dad would love to see you". Something inside of me felt this was urgent. I called my sisters and brother. My sister, Nanette, and I drove straight away to see him. When we arrived he was so weak and seemed to have aged over night. He was frail, yet his eyes beamed as we entered the room. We each took some time alone with him because he was so weak and could barely speak. We did not want to tire him. When I came near to him, he gently caressed my hand and whispered how proud of me he was and that he loved me with all his heart. He asked to forgive him for being so hard on me. I just looked at him lovingly and held him to me and told him how much I loved him. We just sat together for a long time quietly holding hands and listening to the birds outside his window.

My brother, Tee, soon arrived from Florida. He had driven all night, but wanted to see Dad right away. Nanette and I felt it was too much for him to have all of us there so we headed home. I did not want to leave him. I knew in my heart it would be the last time I would see his gently face. I held my tears until we got into the car and then my sister and I cried all the way home.

My brother sent his wife and my stepmother to town to pick up a few things, then Tee returned to Dad. Tee said Dad smiled and thanked him for being there, and how blessed he was with his children...then drifted away. We each had our time to say good bye in our own special way. More than all the years with my father, none were more precious than those last moments with him.   Loving you Always Dad